Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who listens to the lyrics... I’ve already bitched about Justin Bieber, but he’s not the only one whose songs make me say “huh.”
"Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" by Wham:
Cuddle up baby, move in tightWe'll go dancing tomorrow night
It's cold out there but it's warm in bed
They can dance, we'll stay home instead
See, George, this is why she* does not wake you up before she go-gos. Because she wants to dance, and you will try to talk her into staying in bed. She doesn't want to do the nasty, she wants to do the go-go. Go dance with her, you horny jerk.
*Yes, I know it's likely he didn't have a "she" in mind. But at the time, he would have given us that impression, so that's what I'm going with.Though we never thought that we could lose
There's no regret
If I had to do the same again
I would my friend, Fernando
Well, of course you would do it again if you had to. That's what "had to" means, Abba. It means you don't have a choice. Did you mean "If I had the choice to do it again, I would?" If so, say that. God.
"Cold Shot" by Stevie Ray Vaughan
I really meant I was sorry
For ever causing you pain
You showed your appreciation
By walking out anyway
Okay, Stevie, I'm sorry to be picking on you when you're dead and all, but here's the deal. You caused her pain. So she walked out. It was nice of you to apologize, but she is under no obligation to remain with you, pain-causing-guy, just because you said you're sorry. So don't be all snarky 'bout her showing her appreciation by walking out. Also, if you were still alive, I'd suggest you look into the classic hurt-apologize cycle of an abusive relationship to see why this is an inappropriate expectation on your part. But you're not. Again, sorry about that.
Pretty much any song that threatens to change my "point of view," mostly on Radio Disney
I'm tired of little teenyboppers claiming they can change my "point of view." You can't. You might be able to change my opinion, but my point of view is not the same thing. So quit it.
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